When Your Employee and Your New Boss Are Friends

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This is a question that came to us from a viewer to our site in the San Francisco area.
Question: We have a new managing director (MD) who transferred back from one of our overseas offices and has taken over leading our division. One of my direct reports worked with this MD before he did his two-year stint overseas and knows him well. I don't know him at all. The other day my employee told me that she had had drinks with the new MD after work the previous night and said she'd gotten him up to speed on what we're doing in our group. I know my employee is looking to move up, but I'm not planning on going anywhere anytime soon. My concern is that she's after my job. She may be angling to get me out and herself in. I didn't like that she met with the MD before I'd had a chance to do that and I plan on telling her that. What's your thought on what I should do here to make sure I don't become expendable? [display_podcast]
Answer: The writer (a senior director) could be overreacting to a possibly harmless situation. Her employee (a director) knew the guy well before he headed off to his ex-pat assignment, so it may not be so unusual that they had drinks on his return. And he could have sought her out, not the other way around. Because of those two possibilities, to come down on her employee would be unwise. Here's what Ask Emma suggests.

#1: Calm down first. The worst thing this senior director can do is seem defensive. And don't read the employee the riot act. Tell the employee in a calm and friendly way that since she (the senior director) hadn't yet met with the MD, it would have been better if the employee had left out the info on how she (the senior director) runs her department's groups and instead deferred that report-out to her, just as she was used to doing with the last MD. Fine if the employee talked about what she and her group are doing...after all, the two do know each other...but to have left the higher level stuff to her boss (the senior director). The senior director shouldn't make a big deal out of this.

#2: Immediately get a meeting with the new MD (how come that hasn't happened yet?) and get him up to speed, from the senior director's strategic view (yes, her view!) and get a relationship going with him. The senior director needs to establish herself as the leader with the MD and fast. And she needs to look confident, knowledgeable and in charge, but not a control freak. In that meeting she needs to say good things about all of her direct reports, including the employee who knows him. And she can acknowledge that her employee told her about the meeting that they'd had.

#3: Find some very quick wins to have within the first 30-60 days that will help the new MD and make him look good. The senior director has to set herself up as indispensable right away.

#4: Should the employee be angling for the senior director's job, keep an eye on her and watch for misinformation that might be passed along to the MD. All the more reason for this senior director to begin, cultivate and maintain a leader-to-boss relationship with the new guy in charge.

#5: Finally, if the employee continues to have these off-line discussions with the MD, the senior director will need to get expectations set both with the new MD and with her employee about what topics are in and what are out for these ad hoc conversations with him. No anger, frustration or defensiveness in her voice. She needs to always remain cool, confident, and in charge of her emotions.

Denise Brouillette is the president of The Innovative Edge LLC and The Women's Edge in Leading.